Last Sunday

Last Sunday in Dilling, Tennessee, a man sitting in the second row of St Bartholomew church burst into flames and shot out the window in a ball of fire.

He was nibbling M&Ms. Serves him right.

Vengeance is mine, saith the Lord.

"You think he was eating those chocolate covered M&Ms with the peanuts inside," asked Emma Kayle. "I bet he was."

"The milk chocolate centers ones make me sleepy in church," said Faye Class. "You think he would think before he'd risk it all. Eating M&Ms in church is like biting the pin off a hand-grenade. Kapow!"